Love my mother, love my mother, love my mother, love my father…

Narrated by Abu Huraira: A man came to Allah’s Apostle and said, “O Allah’s Apostle! Who is more entitled to be treated with the best companionship by me?” The Prophet said, “your mother.” The man said. “Who is next?” The Prophet said, “your mother.” The man further said, “Who is next?” The Prophet said, “your mother.” The man asked for the fourth time, “Who is next?” The Prophet said, “your father. “ (Sahih Bukhari, Book #73, Hadith #2)

I never truly grasped the meaning of this hadith until I attained parenthood. The position that Allah has given to a mother and a father is immence. Kindness to one’s mother is three times more important than to one’s father. That means 75% of the kindness and love and companionship goes to the mother and 25% of this goes to the father. Three fourth of the better part of the love and respect goes to the mother – One fourth of the remaining part of the love and respect goes to the father.

I have seen my wife go through the labor and pangs and still possess the selfless, utter dedication towards our child and her needs. The unconditional love has been embossed into a mother’s heart by Allah; the love of another more than the love of self. Definitely, a to be mother goes through a lot more than a to be father; physically as well as mentally.

The following words that I had come across sometime back describing the unparalleled gifts of a mother stand so very true:

It is the right of your mother that you should appreciate that she carried you [in her womb] the way nobody carries anybody, She fed you the fruits of her heart which nobody feeds anybody. She protected you [during pregnancy] with her ears, eyes, hands, legs, hair, limbs, [in short] with her whole being, gladly, cheerfully, and carefully; suffering patiently all the worries, pains, difficulties, and sorrows. Till the hand of God removed you from her and brought you into this world. Then she was most happy, feeding you forgetting her own hunger, clothing you even if she herself had no clothes, giving you milk and water not caring for her own thirst, keeping you in the shade, even if she had to suffer from the heat of the sun, giving you every comfort with her own hardships; lulling you to sleep while keeping herself awake.

And these words resonate in the depths of my soul as I watch my wife lull our daughter, Zainab, to sleep. These words resonate in the depths of my soul as I saw her feel every pain our child felt. Parents heart smiles whenever their child’s heart does and their heart aches whenever their child’s body aches. Zainab’s needs were hers. My wife felt Zainab’s hunger and thirst more than she felt her own. Really its just unexplainable how for us as a parent, Zainab’s cries brings grieve to our heart. Her happiness, her well being and her contentment were more rewarding than any worldly accomplishments.

As I watched my daughter peacefully doze on the bed, I couldn’t help but think of another woman, the one who gave birth to me years ago, my own mother. And also my father. Though I can’t remember it, I can almost see my mother doing the exact same thing my wife was doing just now years ago. I could see her looking over me when I was an infant with eyes full of love and joy, eyes full of hopes and wonders. I could see my father play with me in the same way as I do with Zainab, waiting for one small smile of hers to invade her charming face.

Never will you be able to understand your parents until you become one yourself. That’s the only time you will be able to read as you would read an open book.

Allah in His Magnificence and Knowledge understands this incredible bond between a parent and their children, specially a mother and her children. Allah understands it more than anyone, Him who created it. That is why Allah says in the Holy Quran:

“Allah has ordained for you, that you worship none but Him, and to be kind to our parents And if any one or both of them reach old age do not say a word of contempt or repel them but address them with honour, and speak to them with kindness, and lower your wing of humility and pray to Allah (SWT) -‘My Lord, bless them as they have cherished me in childhood.” (Surah Isra 17:23-24)

Surah Nisa, Ch. No. 4, Verse No.1 says: “Respect the womb that bore you.” (Surah Nisa 4:1)

Surah A’nam, Ch.6, Verse No.151, says: “You have to be kind to your parents.” (Surah A’nam 6:151)

Again in Surah Luqman Ch.31, Verse No.14; it again says the same thing that: “We have enjoined on the human beings to be kind to his parents. In travail upon travail, did their mother bore them and in years twain was their weaning.” (Surah Luqman 31:14)

A similar thing is repeated again in Surah Ahqaf, Ch.46, Verse No.15: “We have enjoined on the human beings to be kind to his parents. In pain did their mother bore them and in pain did she give them birth.” (Surah Ahqaf 46:15)

“Thy Lord hath decreed that ye worship none but Him, and that ye be kind to parents. Whether one or both of them attain old age in thy life, say not to them a word of contempt, nor repel them, but address them in terms of honour. And, out of kindness, lower to them the wing of humility, and say: “My Lord! bestow on them thy Mercy even as they cherished me in childhood.”” (Surah Isra 17:23-24)

That is why children, love thy mother, love thy mother, love thy mother, love thy father … because nobody will ever love you as much as they do!