Passages from Sahih al-Adab al-Mufrad concerning Obedience to one’s Parents

Obedience to Parents

Passages from Sahih al-Adab al-Mufrad concerning Obedience to one’s Parents.

Chapter 1: The saying of Allah the Exalted, “and we have enjoined upon man to be good to his parents”

1/1 From Abu Umru ash-Shaibaanee who said, “the owner of this house narrated to us,” and he indicated with his hand to the house of ‘Abdullah, that, “I asked the Prophet (Sallallahu alayhi wassallam), ‘which action is the most beloved to Allah?’ He said, ‘Prayer at its correct time’. I said, ‘then which action? ‘ He said, ‘birr (good treatment, kindness) to the parents.’ I said, ‘then which?’ He said ‘Jihad in the way of Allah'”

‘Abdullah said, “he told me these, and if I had asked further, he would have told me.”

[Sahih – Irwa (1197)]

2/2 From ‘Abdullah ibn ‘Umar who said, “the Lord is pleased when the parents are pleased, and is Angry when the parents are angry.”

[Hasan as mawquf, Sahih as marfu’ al-Sahihah 515]

Chapter 2: Birr to the Mother

3/3 From Bahz ibn Hakim from his father from his grandfather who said, “I said, ‘O Messenger of Allah who is most deserving of my birr?’ He said, ‘your mother.’ I said, ‘who is most deserving of my birr?’ He said, ‘your mother.’ I said, ‘who is most deserving of my birr?’ He said, ‘your mother.’ I said, ‘who is most deserving of my birr?’ He said, ‘your father, then your closest relation, then your closest relation.'”

[Hasan – Irwa (2232,829)]

4/4 From ibn ‘Abbas, “that a man came to him and said, ‘I proposed to a woman and I yearned that she marry me. Then someone else proposed to her and she desired to marry him. Then I seduced her, then killed her, so is there repentance for me?’ He said, ‘is your mother alive?’ He replied, ‘no.’ So ibn ‘Abbas said, ‘repent to Allah Azza wa Jall and seek to get close to Him as much as you can.'”

(Ataa ibn Yaaser) said, “so I went to ibn ‘Abbas and asked him, ‘why did you ask if his mother was alive?’ He said, ‘indeed I do not know an action which can get one closer to Allah then birr to the mother'”

[Sahih – al-Sahihah (2799)]

Chapter 3: Birr to the father

5/5 From Abu Hurayra who said, “it was said, ‘O Messenger of Allah (Sallallahu alayhi wassallam), who is most deserving of my birr?’ He replied, ‘your mother’. He said, ‘then who?’ He replied, ‘your mother.’ He said, ‘then who?’ He said, ‘your mother.’ He said, ‘then who?’ He replied, ‘your father'”

[Sahih, al-Irwa (837), al-Da’ifah (under no 4992)]

Chapter 4: Gentle words to the parents

6/8 from Taysala ibn Mayyaas who said, “I was with the Najadat (a group of the Hururiyyah) and I committed a sin which I regarded to be Major, so I mentioned this to ibn ‘Umar. He said, ‘what sin is it?’ I said, ‘this and this.’ He said, ‘this is not from the Major sins, the major sins are nine:

Associating partners with Allah, killing a soul, fleeing from the advancing army, to accuse a chaste woman, eating riba, eating the property of an orphan, to apostatize in the mosque, the one who ridicules/derides others, and making the parents cry due to disobedience to them.’

ibn ‘Umar said to me, ‘do you fear the fire and wish to enter the Paradise?’ I said, ‘of course, by Allah!’ He said, ‘are your parents alive?’ I said, ‘I have a mother.’ He said, ‘then by Allah! If you were to speak gently to her and feed her, you would certainly enter Paradise, as long as you stay away from the Major sins.'”

[Sahih, al-Sahihah (2898)]

7/9 From Urwa who said about the verse, “and lower for them the wings of humility out of mercy” – ‘do not prevent them from anything that they love.’ [Sahih Isnad]

Chapter 5: Repaying the Parents

8/10 From Abu Hurayra from the Prophet (Sallallahu alayhi wassallam) that he said, “the son can never repay his parent. Except that he finds him a slave, then buys him and sets him free.”

[Sahih, Irwa (1747)]

9/11 From Abu Buraydah that he was with ibn ‘Umar and a Yemeni man was making tawaf of the House carrying his mother on his back saying, “I am her humble camel where her camel would have gotten frightened I will not” Then he said, ‘O ibn ‘Umar! Do you think that I have repaid her?’ He said, ‘no, not even a for a single moan that escaped her during child birth.’

Then ibn ‘Umar made tawaf of the house, then came to the Station (of Abraham) and prayed two rak’ahs. Then he said, ‘O ibn Abu Musa! Indeed, every two rak’ahs expiate what came before them.’

[Sahih Isnad]

10/13 From ‘Abdullah ibn Umru who said, “a man came to the Prophet (Sallallahu alayhi wassallam) to give him the bay’ah for hijrah, and he left his parents crying. So the Prophet said, ‘return to your parents and make them laugh as you have made them cry'”

[Sahih, al-Ta’liq al-Raghib (3/213)]

Chapter 6: Disobedience to Parents

12/15 From Abu Bakra who said, “the Messenger of Allah (Sallallahu alayhi wassallam) said, ‘shall I not inform you of the greatest of the major sins?’ [three times] They said, ‘of course O Messenger of Allah!’ He said, ‘associating partners with Allah, disobedience to the parents – then he sat, reclining – and the false statement.’ He kept repeating them until I said, ‘if only he would stop'”

[Sahih, Ghayah al- Maram (277)]

Chapter 7: Allah curses the one who curses his Parents.

13/17 From Abu al-Tufayl who said, “Ali was asked, ‘did the Prophet(Sallallahu alayhi wassallam) favour you with something that he did not favour for the rest of the people?’ He said, ‘the Prophet (Sallallahu alayhi wassallam) did not favour anything for us that he did not favour for the people, except for what is in the hilt of my sword.’ Then he removed a piece of paper and written on it was, ‘Allah curses the one who slaughters for the sake of other than Allah. Allah curses the one who steals the boundary posts of the land (in order to make his plot of land bigger). Allah curses the one who curses his parents. Allah curses the one who aids an innovator.'”

[Sahih, al-Mishkat (4070)]

Chapter 8: Birr is for the Parents in those matters that do not involve disobedience (to Allah)

14/18 From Abu al-Darda who said, “the Messenger (Sallallahu alayhi wassallam) enjoined me with 9 things: do not associate anything with Allah, even if you are cut into pieces or burned. And never leave the obligatory prayers deliberately, and the one that leaves them deliberately becomes absolved of protection. And do not drink alcohol for it is the door to all evil. And obey your parents, and if they command you to leave your worldly possessions then do so for them. And do not dispute/contend with the leader of the Muslims, even if you think you are right, and do not flee from the advancing army, even if you are destroyed and your companions flee. And spend of your property on your family. And never raise your stick against your family. And fill them with the fear of Allah.”

[Sahih, Irwa (2026)]

15/20 From ‘Abdullah ibn Umru who said, “a man came to the Prophet (Sallallahu alayhi wassallam) intending to go on jihad. So he said, ‘are your parents alive?’ He said, ‘yes.’ So he said, ‘your jihad is with them.'”

[Sahih, Irwa (1199)]

Chapter 9: The one whose Parents attain old age and he does not enter Paradise

16/21 From Abu Hurayra, from the Prophet (Sallallahu alayhi wassallam) that he said, “may he be disgraced and humiliated, may he be disgraced and humiliated, may he be disgraced and humiliated.” They said, “who O Messenger of Allah?” He said, “the one whose parents attain old age, or one of them, and he enters Hellfire (by not serving them).”

[Sahih, al-Ta’liq ar-Raghib (3/215)]

Chapter 10: Not seeking forgiveness for one’s father who is Mushrik

17/23 From ibn ‘Abbas, about the saying of Allah, ‘and if one of them, or both of them attain old age during your life, then do not say to them “Uff”‘ until His saying, ‘as they brought me up when I was young’ – “this was abrogated (or the meaning was restricted) by the ayah in Surah al-Bara’, ‘it is not for the Prophet and the believers that they seek forgiveness for the mushriks, even if they be of the close relations, after it has been made clear to them that they are the Companions of Hell.'”

[Hasan Isnad]

Chapter 11: Birr to the Parent who is a Mushrik

18/24 From Sa’d ibn Abi Waqqas who said, “four verses were revealed with regards to me in the Book of Allah: My mother swore that she would not eat and drink until I disassociated myself from Muhammad (Sallallahu alayhi wassallam), So Allah revealed. ‘and if they endeavour to make you commit shirk with me, of which you have no knowledge, then do not obey them and accompany them in this world in a good way.’ I took a sword which I liked, so I said, ‘O Messenger of Allah give me this’ so the verse was revealed, ‘they ask you about the spoils of War’ I became sick so the Messenger of Allah (Sallallahu alayhi wassallam) visited me.

So I said, ‘O Messenger of Allah! I intend to divide my property, shall I give a half away (in charity)?’ He said, ‘no.’ So I said, ‘a third?’ and he remained silent. And afterwards, a third was made permissible. I drank alcohol with a group of the Ansar, and then a man amongst them struck me on my nose at a place called Lahya Jamal. So I went to the Prophet (Sallallahu alayhi wassallam) and Allah revealed the verse with regards to the prohibition of alcohol.”

[Sahih, al-Mishkat (3072)]

-Extracts from Sahih al-Adab al-Mufrad of Imam Al-Bukhari

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